Bravey: Chasing Dreams, Befriending Pain, and Other Big Ideas

by Alexi Pappas

I realized that this wasn’t really about me versus her—meaning any individual girl in my race—nor was this about me versus the world at large. It was about me versus me, just like in middle school, running as fast as I can and then some. It was about enjoying the results of my hard work and all the help I got from the people I love. My mental fitness and physical fitness were completely in sync, peaking simultaneously. It felt like the steep climb that began when I was a freshman at Dartmouth, with the countless days of pain and commitment, had culminated all in this one moment of perfect harmony. “Me versus me” doesn’t do this feeling justice either—it’s not a versus. It’s me within me and me outside of me. I was running around the track while looking at a miniature diorama version of myself running around the track and this image repeated in my heart to infinity. It felt like my mind could tell my body to do anything and it would do it. Some people call this flow, but I call it bliss.