For true progress to be made, women need to be allowed to be many different things all at once. The same goes for men. We do not have to make sense according to some objectively constructed notion of what is ‘male’ and what is ‘female’. We can be fluid and contradictory. We can be women who understand our anger, who refuse to mask it with other emotions, at the same time as understanding that power also comes from friendship and solidarity and thoughtfulness. Tenderness is not the same as weakness.