to drink coffee with a ghost

by Amanda Lovelace

you did not have a medicine spoon filled with poison. you had no gun. no knife. no ax. no belt. no ready hand. however, the weapon you did wield proved to be equally as dangerous. - your words.

i walk the thin line between nostalgia & trauma, never fully knowing the difference.

my trauma doesn’t get wiped away just because it’s inconvenient for you to love someone who was also capable of causing others pain.

your comfort is not more important than my journey to healing.

sharing the same family tree doesn’t often make people stay. find family in the ones who make you laugh uncontrollably. find family in the ones who take your side but also talk you through your wrongdoings. find family in the ones who would hop on a plane & fly across countries the moment you needed them. find family in the ones who rejoice in you, especially when you’re unsure of yourself. find the ones who will face the fire with you. - they’re your real family.