“Instead of offering a legitimate show of community or problem solving, moms almost universally will try to one-up your source of parenting frustration with their own similar but clearly much worse struggles,” Lauren, who calls herself a “broke white college student” in the Pacific Northwest, explained. “We could easily offer each other an exchange of hosting playdates while one takes a few hours of alone time, but then we’d be admitting that we need help—and are clearly not up to the task of parenting. Better to cling to the torch of martyrdom with a white-knuckled death grip.”
