Though they aren’t easy to follow, the therapy transcripts allow Carson to speak loudly and clearly for herself, and a large portion of them focus on her relationship with Annemarie. The first recorded session begins with the words “I’ve been thinking of Annamarie S.” At first I thought “Annamarie” might be typo on the part of the transcriber, Barbara, or a phonetic reflection of the way Carson said her name, lilting and southern. But throughout Illumination, she writes her name as Anna Marie. How we make beloved others our own.