The rise in perfectionism seems to have begun about forty years ago, which means that many of those early high achievers are parents now and are unknowingly passing that perfectionism along to their children. “They can feel our anxiety about them,” Rachel Simmons tells me. “They can feel our dissatisfaction with who they are. Why doesn’t my kid want to build things? Why doesn’t my daughter have many friends? They only realize they’re not okay when we send those messages to them.” Parents may think they’re helping their kids succeed by pushing them to reach the top of the class and be the best
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