Before and After (Before and After, #1)

by Andrew Shanahan

But he tried to stomp me to death, so I wasn’t going to feel sorry for him getting an atomic wedgie.

Someone screams something improbable about Greta Thunberg.

he often felt like he was just waiting for someone to explain something fundamental to him – what he was supposed to do, so he could just get on and do it.

It’s the strangest feeling to look at your body and know that part of you is already dead. It’s like a localised form of time travel – where my leg already knows what lies beyond the grave.

Does their hatred make them stupid?

I’m going to America. I’ve researched it thoroughly and the only dangers are guns and ignorance.”

It must be about two in the morning and I am engaged in my nightly internal argument about whether I can be arsed to go through the rigmarole of getting up to have a wee

Is Disneyland even still there? Of course it is. It has to be. Disney is a universal constant, like time or gravity.

the fact that I am not dead is all the encouragement I really need.

There wasn’t any particular effort made towards learning things about the world. Ben just liked to identify places that seemed like they might be quiet. He particularly liked maps of forests.

but in my defence, experimental grooming passes the time.

Gaze ye on my naked form world and witness the fitness.