As a coping skill, I had learned to tune in to my surroundings—so extensively that I’d lost touch with my own experiences and had tried to white-knuckle my way through life. This hypersensitivity exhausted my nervous system, often filling me with anxiety, dread, and neck pain. I came to hate this about myself and pushed myself even harder the next time—wondering if maybe I could just get over this part of myself and simply focus on others’ expectations.
