The Upside of Falling

by Alex Light

I was going through two books a week. I could not get enough. It was like, if love couldn’t exist in reality, at least it was alive in fiction. Between the pages it was safe.

That’s fair. I get this mindset.

“Star-crossed lovers are two people whose love is doomed,” I read aloud. “There are so many forces working against them that not even the stars can keep them together.”

That’s not it…it can’t be…is it ? Let me Google this one real quick.

Love was destructive, dangerous. It was safer on pages, and these books were enough of an experience for me.

Ummmmmmm, 😬…nvm, I’m not getting this mindset anymore. Lol.

“Love’s still worth the risk, even if it can lead to heartbreak.”

Trueee

“It’s easy for you to say that,” Jenny said. The class fell silent. “What does that mean?” I asked. “Love. It’s easy to ridicule it when you’ve never felt it.”

Damn.😬

Her words kind of hit me like a punch to the throat. I knew she probably didn’t mean anything by them.

Damn. This is a good class debate ! Well done.

Anyway, Jenny didn’t know the details of my parents’ divorce. She knew my dad wasn’t around—that much was easy to figure out after spending time at my house.

Ooooohhhhhh, nvm..I understand her mindset on love now…again. 😭

I waited for the ground to begin to shake. For the walls to cave and the ceiling to follow until we were standing in a pile of rubble and LIAR was burned into my forehead.

Lmaoo😭. Dramatic.

And, wow, maybe those books were kind of onto something about this whole kissing-making-time-stop thing because with Brett’s lips on mine, it kind of felt that way.

It be like that sometimes babe.

I laughed, swatting his hand away when he reached for another grape. “First rule is nicknames are not allowed.”

Girl, what do you mean no nicknameeeessss ???

“I can’t believe I have a crush on a girl with such horrible ice cream taste.”

Aww, they’re cute♥️

I marched to the elevator, pressed the button to the lobby, and waited. My arms were beginning to ache from the weight of all these books, but I didn’t care. It was nice to feel that weight somewhere other than my heart.

Is she throwing these books out ?? Do you know how much all those books cost ?? Books are NOT cheap ! TF 🙄 Girl, be so serious PLEASE

I reached into the bag and blindly chose a book. I didn’t even look at it, I just opened it to a random page, tore it out, then threw it into the water. I watched it float, then slowly move away. I breathed, counted to five, then threw the entire book in.

OH SHE IS BUGGINNNNNNNNNN. There is not a man on God’s green earth, that is gonna make me destroy, trash, or damage my BOOKSSSSSSS❗️

I needed new books to read after the mass paper-murder I committed on the bridge. Which, looking back, may have been a smidge uncalled for.

Yeah, no shit crazy pants. 🙄

“I think . . . ,” she began, looking up at the ceiling, “I wouldn’t get a divorce. I would stay with him.” “Why?” “Because I love him.” She said it so easily. “Because I believe him when he says he’s sorry.”

???????? What ?🫤…you know what, I would expect nothing less from someone like her..I’m sorry, but she gives exactly what I thought…weak…next.

“But how do you know he really means it?” I asked. “Because he’s trying, Brett. He’s really trying with these counseling sessions.

*Looks at camera* He’s literally only doing it BECAUSE HE GOT CAUGHT BY HIS SON !?!?! …..what…..are we serious right now ?

How do we decide if one mistake is worth giving all of this up? The life we’ve built together?”

Again, I expect this from someone like her…no job, nothing of her own but her son…of course this is her mindset. SMH. Sad.

If that meant sitting in an office with Dr. Kim and talking about my feelings or opening the door and letting my dad back inside—I’d do that for her.

Better than me…that’s for sure.

“Becca,” she said. “You’re back.” She knew who I was. All this time. “Is my dad home?” I asked. “I’m Maeve,” she said, holding out her hand. “It’s nice to officially meet you.”

1st of all: Not she knew who you were all along. & she allowed that man to not have any contact with/ his daughter ???? Seriously.😐 2nd of all: Bitch, READ THE ROOM ! I don’t care what your name is, MOVE !

“Read to me.” “Why?” “Because you go somewhere else when you read. I want to go there with you.” We sat there and I read aloud, my back to Brett’s chest. He pulled me a little closer, held me a little tighter. And this time, we escaped together.

Aww, this part was cute !🥰