Outer Order, Inner Calm: Declutter and Organize to Make More Room for Happiness

by Gretchen Rubin

getting control of the stuff of life often makes it easier to feel more in control of our lives generally.

When I’m surrounded by a mess, I feel restless and unsettled.

By getting rid of the things I don’t use, don’t need, or don’t love, as well as the things that don’t work, don’t fit, or don’t suit, I free my mind—and my shelves—for what I truly value.

Once visual noise is eliminated, I feel more focused and there’s more room in my mind, my schedule, and my space for creative activity. Instead of being sources of stress, my home and my office are places of comfort and energy.

OUTER ORDER REDUCES GUILT. I feel relieved of guilt about the possessions I’ve never used and the projects I’ve never finished.

When too much stuff piles up, I feel paralyzed. Digging myself out of the mess seems insurmountable, so I stay stuck.

First, we make choices—what possessions to keep and what to do with them. Once we’ve cleared through our things, we create order by organizing, repairing, and attending to neglected areas. Next, we reflect on ourselves, to know ourselves—and others—so that we can take those individual insights into account. Then, once the clutter is vanquished, it’s useful to cultivate helpful habits to maintain that order, so the clutter doesn’t return. The fifth and final step is to add beauty to make our surroundings more inviting and comfortable.

If you want a golden rule that will fit everybody, this is it: Have nothing in your houses that you do not know to be useful, or believe to be beautiful.

Clearing clutter is exhausting because it requires us to make choices—and making choices is hard. It takes intellectual energy as well as emotional energy.

When trying to decide the fate of a possession, ask yourself: Do I need it? Do I love it? Do I use it?

But if you don’t need it, love it, or use it, you should probably get rid of it.

For any possession that passes this test, ask one additional question: Where does it belong?

Outer order isn’t a matter of having less or having more; it’s a matter of wanting what we have.

USE A PHOTOGRAPH TO EVALUATE CLUTTER.

Now, if three times the thought has occurred to me, “I wonder if I should get rid of that,” I get rid of it.

Before you accept something for free or take advantage of a great deal, decide: Do I really need this thing? Do I love it?

When clearing clutter, one way to fight the endowment effect is to ask, “If I didn’t already own this possession, would I buy it?”

Push yourself to finish an unfinished project or call an end to it. The easiest way to complete a project is to abandon it. Get that stuff off your shelf and off your conscience.

The longer I own a possession, the more precious it becomes, even if it has never been particularly valued.

Because of the duration effect, I try to hurry unwanted things out the door. The longer I keep them, the harder it is to let them go.

The best way to deal with clutter is never to accept these freebies in the first place. Something free can end up costing a lot of time, energy, and space.

And are there whole rooms, whole closets, entire filing cabinets, or sets of shelves where nothing comes or goes? These areas begin to feel stale and stagnant, and if nothing they hold ever moves around, they should probably be cleared out.

Your first instinct should be to get rid of stuff. If you don’t own it, you don’t have to organize it.

“If I were moving, would I bother to wrap this in bubble wrap and stick it in a box? Or would I chuck it or give it away?”

For most people, it’s deeply calming to see outer order emerge. Perhaps it’s the tangible sense of control, or the relief from visual noise, or the release from guilt and frustration. Creating order—even with things as mundane as socks or supplies—gives a disproportionate boost of energy and cheer. There’s so much we can’t control, but we can control our stuff. Create order.

Clutter attracts clutter, so once clutter begins to accumulate, an area tends to get worse and worse. Get in the habit of clearing clutter magnets regularly. That way, the mounds can never grow too high.

In general, it’s more useful to think about accessibility than to think about storage. If you want to store something but don’t care if it’s accessible—well, that’s a clue that you may not need to keep that item at all.

It takes a lot of energy, time, physical strength, and taxing decision-making—plus, it’s emotionally draining.

clearing clutter becomes an exercise in self-knowledge.

Ask yourself, “Why am I clearing this clutter? What’s my purpose?”

One of my favorite unhealthy treats? Telling myself, “I can’t keep things orderly, I’m too busy. I deserve a break.”

It can be painful to admit that we aren’t going to use certain possessions—but all that junk just gets in our way.

Sometimes, we’re sad to relinquish an identity, so we cling to possessions as a way to insulate ourselves from change.

Just because we’re busy doesn’t mean we’re being productive. Working is one of the most dangerous forms of procrastination.

IS YOUR CLUTTER BACKWARD-LOOKING OR FORWARD-LOOKING?

I remind myself that the things that annoy me now are the things that I’ll remember with longing in the future.

DON’T LET THE PERFECT BE THE ENEMY OF THE GOOD.

Even if we can’t create or maintain perfect order, it’s still worth trying to make things better.

Don’t save mementos that hold no memories for you; don’t keep a keepsake unless you value it.

It’s far easier to keep up than to catch up, and with the right habits, clutter never accumulates.

Do any task that can be finished in less than one minute, without delay.

DON’T PUT THINGS DOWN; PUT THINGS AWAY.

“I have plenty of room for the things that are important to me. I can find those things, I can see them, and if something new comes into my life, I have room to expand.”

My empty shelf gives me the luxury of space; I have room for more things to come into my life.

If someone asked me what my idea of luxury is, I think my answer would be: flowers in the house all year round.

The irony is that just as outer order contributes to inner calm, inner calm contributes to outer order. When we feel serene, energetic, and focused, that’s when it becomes easier to keep our surroundings in good order. It’s a virtuous cycle.