Be assertive and interpret their messages as being about their feelings. “It sounds like you are angry that I chose to …” “It sounds like you are sad that I will not …” “I understand you are very unhappy about what I have decided to do. I’m sorry you feel that way.” “I realize this is disappointing to you. How can I help?” “It’s hard for you when I have other things to do, isn’t it?” The main principle is this: Empathize with the distress people are feeling, but make it clear that it is their distress.
