The Blade Itself (The First Law, #1)

by Joe Abercrombie

If you could have stabbed someone in the face with the phrase “good day,” the head of the Guild of Mercers would have lain dead on the floor.

“It’s terribly hot in here, isn’t it? It’s a wonder these poor fellows don’t pass out, and crash to the floor with a sound like a cupboard full of saucepans.”

Jezal was so bemused that he had not even the presence of mind to call him a damn idiot once he was out of earshot.