The Modern Break-Up

by Daniel Chidiac

These days, it’s like we’re expected to accept people’s ignorance and rudeness, and if we do express ourselves or call them out on it, we’re the ones who are seen as crazy. We’re all so scared to say what we want in case we get judged for it,

don’t get it, though. Why is he doing all this shit when he’s the one who left me?” I replied, taking a drag of my cigarette. “Because he thinks he can just pop into your life whenever he feels like it. On his terms.

He got upset when he wanted to be friends and I said no. He was so selfish. It was all about him. I offered him everything. He rejected it, so in the end, he got none of me. I’m not a toy to be played with when someone feels like it.

“You know, to love the wrong person or to be obsessed with someone can be like a drug. Having a bit of it feels good at the time, but it’s not good for you. They say if addicts just get over the hurdle with no drugs, they won’t want it anymore. It’s the same as this. You gotta cut the snake off at the head. Having absolutely no contact is the best thing for you. You really need to give it time to fade,” she continued.

By not contacting him, he’s starting to feel rejection. I bet it’s the only reason he sent you that message … his own insecurities, not because he genuinely cares. I know that’s hard to swallow, but it’s the truth. If he cared, he would be begging for you back. But I don’t think he has that in him, and I think you deserve someone who does,”

“Closure comes from knowing ourselves, knowing our worth, and finally realizing what we deserve. It’s seeing the other person for who they really are, not who we’ve made them to be in our head.

you shouldn’t have to be someone else to suit anybody. You are who you are, and you don’t give that up for anyone,”

don’t sacrifice the person you are to suit somebody else’s insecurities, jealousy, or lack of love. And stop letting your happiness be solely dependent on someone else’s mood.

And looking back, was it true that I wasn’t “feeling it” with these other people that would have done anything for me, or was I just being clouded by my desire to want someone I thought I couldn’t have? Had I become that distant from my worth? I

We have this overwhelming desire to feel wanted, to feel accepted. In a world that seems so connected, yet so far from having real communication, we crave it. Our high levels of insecurities are making us want it from people who don’t even care about us.

can’t take the risk of being sexual with someone in the hope that more will come of it and then them never speaking to me again.

also had to accept that sometimes those who ignore my offer of love and care are highly insecure themselves. It’s

not rejection, and in a lot of cases, they end up with someone who isn’t half the person I was to them.

If it’s genuine, it’s not so anxious; it’s not so intangible. Lust is quick to assume and tormenting to the mind. It doesn’t truly understand the other and makes irrational decisions that generally make no sense.

I don’t want to put those who don’t give a shit about me on a pedestal anymore, as hard as it might be. If there’s anyone who deserves less of my attention, it’s them.

When I’m not at peace, I find myself latching onto people I like but who aren’t giving me the same attention.

“You have to stop expecting people who don’t love themselves to love you the way you love them.”

‘No matter how attractive a person’s potential may be, you have to date their reality.’

You can know someone isn’t right for you and still be weak toward them.

To accept that compatibility is as important as attraction. When they meet someone new, they have to ask themselves, “What energy is he giving off in regard to his intentions? How does he react to things that are important to me? What are his morals and values?

A real man wants to protect his partner’s emotions, not constantly see them hurt. They don’t want to see them being down and put the blame on them. To me, a big reflection of someone’s character is how they treat you when you’re vulnerable. He took advantage of her vulnerabilities and made her feel scared to be herself. That’s not a relationship. It’s not even a friendship.

If there is “the one” out there for everyone, then everyone would be living happily ever after, and we all know that isn’t the case. At the end of the day, we choose who we dedicate our time to and who we allow in.

A boy wants to be with girls who are always ‘hard to get.’ Wise men choose women. They notice beautiful qualities.

Now, I act like myself more times than not, and I think it challenges people more than anything. When you give less fucks about trying to be something you’re not, people are drawn to you. Everyone wishes they could be themselves unapologetically.

I understand that people have their own insecurities. I understand that the lack of respect someone has for others is a reflection of the respect they have for themselves.

when a great guy does come along, that’s when girls have to stop their bullshit and give someone like that a chance. If you keep rejecting guys who are making a real effort to take you out and get to know you, then you’re also the problem. Sorry to break it to you. Meet them halfway. If what you’re going for now isn’t working for you, make changes. You gotta get real as well,”

think they were very certain about what they wanted. And when they met it, they didn’t overthink it as much. They pursued it. Maybe we have made things so complicated that being certain again is actually the simplest way of finding and accepting love. Now, I think too many options weigh on our mind. There’s more to it. I think a lot of it has to do with ourselves and where we’re at, emotionally and mentally. I think most people in our generation assume that the grass is always greener on the other side … until it isn’t. It’s like we’re never content.

realize now that I wasn’t looking for love; I was anxiously looking to be loved. I valued my self-worth on the attention others were willing to give me. That’s why I always got hurt. That’s why I always doubted myself.

The truth is, I’m in a really good place in my life at the moment and don’t need anyone. I don’t want it to be about needing anyone. I want it to be about wanting them.

I’ve worked out that sometimes I can’t control how some people treat me, but in the end, I can control how much I let it affect me. I’ve worked out that love feels better than hate, that I should embrace those who love me, not the memory of those who pretended to love me. I’ve worked out that I want to give my time to people who help lift me up, not always make me doubt myself.

From this day forward, my freedom lies in knowing I have choices in my life, and I’m the one who makes them. My life is mine; it’s what I choose for it, it’s who I choose to have a part of it. And knowing I have that power over my life makes me smile.