Eleanor Oliphant Is Completely Fine

by Gail Honeyman

I went to see Loretta, the office manager. She has overinflated ideas of her own administrative abilities, and in her spare time makes hideous jewelry, which she then sells to idiots.

There was nothing to tempt me from the choice of desserts, so I opted instead for a coffee, which was bitter and lukewarm. Naturally, I had been about to pour it all over myself but, just in time, had read the warning printed on the paper cup, alerting me to the fact that hot liquids can cause injury. A lucky escape, Eleanor! I said to myself, laughing quietly.

It was halfway to dark by then, with both a moon and a sun sitting high in a sky that was sugar almond pink and shot with gold.

Love this description.

the party carried Sammy’s coffin down the aisle and placed it gently on a sort of raised platform with a roller belt, at the end of which was a set of red velvet curtains. I tried to remember what the platform reminded me of, and it came to me: the supermarket checkout in Tesco, where you place your items and they move toward the cashier.

Incredible.

She smiled at me. Her teeth! Oh, Ms. Temple. She had done her best, but nothing could change the size of them, I supposed. They belonged in a far bigger mouth, perhaps not even a human one.

“My wife’s got Zumba tonight, and so I need to get back for the kids.” I nodded, wondering who Zumba was.

I smiled at many passages in the book, but this one made me laugh out loud.