Even When I'm Gone (Stay with Me, #2)

by Nicole Fiorina

She cried out for me in the place I left her. My feet stayed in front of me, one right after the other, but the small fraction of my heart that hadn’t been corrupted by the pills screamed along with her, clawing at me from the inside out.

“What’s keeping me up at night is the haunting memory of that last breath you took right in front of me.” —Oliver Masters

Brad had passed away two months ago. Now, I was charged with homicide due to mental illness instead of unlawful injury.

Three days were spent off the pills, suffering a heat stroke in a winter storm.

“Mia’s holding up, that one. You’d be proud of those girls, you know. Her and Bria spent the summer organizing a support group for girls suffering from sexual abuse. She’s been keeping busy, that’s for sure.”

“I was on my knees, Ollie, then you pulled everything out from under me and for seven months I crawled through every fucking memory and every empty promise!”

“Stay away from him. He’s going to kill you slowly, and I’m tired of cleaning up his mess.” “I’ll stay away from him, but I’ll never stop loving him.”

“Because love is constant. When you love someone, you can be angry with them, you can hate them, you can be upset or disappointed in them, but you never stop loving them because love endures all other emotions.”

And perhaps I should keep Mia away, but nothing would let me. She was my life source, and though I was confused by a lot, I was certain of one thing: I needed her. Like breathing, I fucking needed her.

Mia had that smile that caused her eyes to disappear along with her top lip, taking up her whole face.

... ew?

“The cruel irony is you are my forever but not my right now.” —Oliver Masters

I can’t lose you through this, but I can’t control myself either. It’s going to get worse, but I promise just one year. Give me a year. After Dolor, I’ll get off the pills, and we never have to look back,”

“I can’t see you like this. You can’t show up in my room. You can’t sit with me in the mess hall. You can’t mess with my head. You stay away for a year, and when we leave, I’ll give you my life.

“You just broke my fucking heart, and yet you’re still standing there. The least you can do is grant me the favor of finishing me off by walking away because you know I can’t so much as breathe without you. So, fucking leave!”

Because my “right now” had expired. I pressed my face into her neck and cried. Like a fucking pussy, I cried.

“For a love everlasting, make her roses out of paper. For a love as poetic, make her roses out of literature. And if you’re lucky enough to find both, remind her every damn day.” —Oliver Masters

“I’m ready to spread my wings.” Jake stretched an arm out to the side. “Your wings or your wiener?”

“I’ll show you. Please, wait for me. Just stay with me, Mia.” “Even when you’re gone?”

“If you don’t walk out of here with Mia, know there are other fish in the sea.” In an instant, my smile faded. “You don’t get it. Mia is the sea.”

“Consuming, timeless, unselfish, love. I’d loved you in my darkest hour when I wasn’t myself, and I’ll love you in every lifetime after this.”

“You both coming tomorrow?” “No,” Ollie said the same time I released, “Yes.” “Maybe,” Ollie caved. “We’ll be there,”

I can accept Masters. I’ll welcome the tosser with open arms if that’s the man you decide to spend the rest of your life with, but not a bloody thing changes between you and me. If I knew for one second the bloke couldn’t take care of you, if he didn’t … love you more than I love you, he’d already be gone.”

Zeke accepted his fate with open arms. He wasn’t scared. He wasn’t afraid. The peace inside him was calm and quiet, but the devastation surrounding him was unwilling to let him go. Then his calmness slid back to Ollie. A silent understanding passed between them, and still, I couldn’t move.

“I did it. I saved her,” Zeke whispered through a cough. “Yeah, you did, my friend.” Ollie broke and forced a small smile over his wet face for him. “Mia, and Ollie, forever,” Zeke finally whispered with a hoarse throat. His eyes blinked closed as blood spread through his shirt.

“The only way to cheat death is by creating a love that will live forever.” —Oliver Masters

“Zeke is love. He is a reminder that no matter how difficult it gets, no matter how often you’re tested or what obstacles are thrown, love is always worth fighting for,” Ollie sucked in a breath and ran a palm down his face, “and dying for.”

Zeke would want us to remember him in smiles, in laughs, and in every joyous moment we find ourselves in, because it’s there, in those rare moments, when he is all around us.”

Love you, brother. E...

My heart warned me with every step I took up the stairs as I followed Lynch. It told me it would leave me too if I continued this path of vengeance, but the monster inside shut that bastard up.