The Heart Principle (The Kiss Quotient, #3)
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Read between December 27 - December 27, 2023
3%
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I don’t question why people do things. I just observe and copy. That’s how to get along in this world.
3%
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I took a leave of absence because I can’t perform when I’m stuck playing in loops like this. I haven’t told my family because I know they wouldn’t understand. They’d tell me to quit indulging myself and snap out of it. Tough love is our way.
4%
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People like me better when I make them feel good about themselves. So I’m constantly assessing her reaction and editing my words to appeal to her.
6%
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When we first started dating, Julian told me that it hurt his feelings when women didn’t swallow, that it made him feel rejected. As a result, I’ve probably swallowed gallons of his semen to safeguard his emotional well-being.
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Family is not safe. Not for me. Tough love is brutally honest and hurts you to help you. Tough love cuts you when you’re
12%
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already bruised and berates you when you don’t heal faster.
16%
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“Just because something isn’t perfect doesn’t mean we need to throw it away.
19%
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and I’m okay in the kitchen as long as I don’t have to touch raw meat. It’s slimy.”
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“She watches people eat, like the food tastes better in someone else’s mouth,” he says with a grin.
30%
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No one should need a diagnosis in order to be compassionate to themself.
31%
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Because it’s complicated. It’s true that Anna and I have been texting all week, making random observations, sharing funny news articles and cute animal videos and stuff like that. Talking to her fills a space in my life that I didn’t realize was empty, and I’ll be sad to see that end.
38%
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“Don’t judge. Everyone’s got their own issues,” I point out. “There was also the one who made him brush his teeth before kissing,” Khai adds. “That’s just good hygiene, especially in the morning,” I say. Michael points his glass at me. “She also made you use hand sanitizer before holding hands and shower before sex.”
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“You know, I can tell based purely off text messages if a girl is into someone,” Michael says. “Yeah, like if the message says ‘I’m into you,’ that’s a pretty sure sign,” I say dryly. “No, get your phone out and text her. I’ll show you what I’m talking about. I can tell within three lines,” he insists. “Plus, don’t you want to know how she’s doing? You guys were originally going to meet up tonight.” Grumbling, I take my phone out of my pocket and text her, How you doing?
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“I’m not going to show you if she says something personal. Also, what if she doesn’t respond right a—” Dots start jumping on the screen, and I get a new message with a smiley face. I’m okay. You? I show Michael so he can analyze the exchange like it’s tea leaves or some shit, and he grins right away. “A smiley emoji straight off. That’s a really good sign.”
39%
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Worse than that, I’m overly sensitive, difficult, “lazy,” and, quite frankly, a bit of a disappointment—except for my relationship with Julian, the son-in-law of their dreams, and my accidental Internet fame.
41%
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Everything passes in time. All colors fade.
63%
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Why does she have to put everyone in their place like this? Why can’t she just be happy for him? For me?
73%
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“You know I tell you these things so it’ll hurt less when you hear it from others,”
92%
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But I guess that’s how it must be when someone’s standards are so impossibly high and their capacity for empathy so limited. They are cruel to others, and cruelest to themself.