Get Out of Your Head: Stopping the Spiral of Toxic Thoughts

by Jennie Allen

We have bought the lie that we are victims of our thoughts rather than warriors equipped to fight on the front lines of the greatest battle of our generation: the battle for our minds.

Or you finally found peace about a less-than-desirable season of your life—but now your emotions have spiraled downward again, and all you do is complain.

Our emotions were leading us to thoughts, and those thoughts were dictating our decisions, and our decisions were determining behaviors, and then the behaviors were shaping our relationships, all of which would take us back to either healthy or unhealthy thoughts.

“Be killing sin or it will be killing you.”6 It’s time for us to fight.

The thing is, I have always believed lies. And not just believed them but built entire chapters of my life around them.

No human is ever meant to be the person who fills our souls or holds in place our worth. Only God can do that. But until I throw off the lie that God’s love isn’t for me, my emotions, decisions, behaviors, and relationships will remain twisted up in the mistaken belief that I’m worthless.

Doubt steals hope. And with no hope, everything that matters doesn’t feel as important anymore.

The danger of toxic thinking is it produces an alternate reality, one in which distorted reasoning actually seems to make sense.

God is real, and I am valuable. My life matters. He is real. I had an enemy, and I’d let him beat me up for too long. I was over it. This was war.

Because alone in the dark the devil can tell you whatever the hell he wants.

our thought lives are the deepest, darkest places of stronghold within us, all hell will try to stop us from being free.

If you ask Mr. Google how many of our many thoughts per day are positive and how many are negative, you will discover that the vast majority—a full 70 percent, some researchers say—are negative.

But we don’t simply need our spiraling thoughts to stop; we need our minds to be redeemed.

But self-help can offer only a better version of yourself; Christ is after a whole new you.

“As he thinks in his heart, so is he.”5

The enemy wants you to settle, to find a way just to survive and be somewhat happy.

“we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places.”6

To put it plainly: all hell is against us meeting with Jesus.

“Be still, and know that I am God.”1

We are either moving toward something or moving away from something.

we aren’t alone in our spirals.

In terms of fulfilling our mission in this life, we can’t do anything worthwhile alone.

God Himself exists in community, the Trinity relating as Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Three persons, one God. Perfect community. Since God Himself lives in community, He formed us to need community too.

I’ve noticed that the idea of living in community is yet one more instruction we tend to regard as a suggestion.

Community is an essential.

The entirety of Scripture assumes community as a given in the life of a God follower. In the Old Testament, community develops within a people group, while in the New Testament it develops within local churches.

When we listen to lies about our worth, we naturally back away from others.

Very true! When I feel and think terrible things about myself the first thing I want to do is retreat and get as far away from people as I can!

If we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus his Son cleanses us from all sin.3

The part of your brain that activates when you feel rejected or uninvited by a friend is the same part of your brain that fires when you’re in physical pain.6 Maybe this is why breakups and severed friendships literally hurt.

Loneliness can make us think that everything is a threat, even if there is no real threat to be found.

Loneliness has been linked to heart disease. And depression. And chronic stress. And poor sleep.

We weren’t made to celebrate victory alone. We weren’t made to suffer hardship alone. We weren’t made to walk through the dailiness of life alone.

female behavior, UCLA researchers found that women seek out more social support during times of stress than men do. Other research has shown that having a strong social network can help people stay healthy.

A tribe,

Nobody can play defense forever; we have to show up. With our whole selves.

If we want to be free of the chaos, friend, we cannot stay alone in the dark with the devil.

Seen. Known. Loved.

“It is when this life-saving mechanism is triggered at inappropriate times or gets stuck in the ‘on’ position that it becomes a problem.”

The type of anxiety that sends our thoughts spiraling is when our emotional reaction to scary things goes beyond rational to illogical because our brains’ fear networks are in overdrive.

We keep finding new concerns to worry about and new facets to each concern, as if by constant stewing we can prepare ourselves for what’s to come.

We experience palpable physical responses to things that are not real threats, and our future-tense fears are leaving us bound up with tight chests, unable to relax or be present, utterly forgetting that there is a God who will give us what we need today, next week, ...

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

He meant it for one simple reason: this earth is not our home, and our home in heaven is secure. So if death is not to be feared, what exactly do we have to be scared of?

Choose to be grateful.

I can’t rely on my thoughts or feelings to hold my faith in place. God holds my faith in place.

how in the world they keep moving forward without giving in to desperation and despair.

I choose to believe God wants me to seek His approval only and release the pressure to please people.

And our wise Father in heaven knows when we’re going to need things, too. Don’t run out ahead of Him,

We’re afraid that the feeling of joy won’t last, or that there won’t be enough, or that the transition to disappointment (or whatever is in store for us next) will be too difficult. We’ve learned that giving in to joy is, at best, setting ourselves up for disappointment and, at worst, inviting disaster.1

Humility is perfect quietness of heart…. It is to expect nothing, to wonder at nothing that is done to me, to feel nothing done against me.