Dear Edward

by Ann Napolitano

The weariness in his uncle’s eyes makes Edward realize, for the first time, why John had needed to save him at all costs. His uncle—with all his will, attention, and care—had been unable to save anyone else. The babies Lacey had carried. Jane and Bruce, and his oldest nephew. And so he had been willing to wreck his own life, even his marriage, to make sure he didn’t lose the nephew who came to live in his house. “I wouldn’t have done that to you”—Edward looks at his uncle and then over at Shay; this applies to her too—“because I know what it’s like to be left behind.” He’s winded by the sentence, as if the truth has taken something from him. He feels a flash of fear, but then sees the look on his uncle’s face. John opens his arms, and Edward steps forward.

I re-wrote this scene a hundred times at least. I knew what I wanted to say, but I couldn't get it to come out right. I was so wordy! Finally, I was talking to my husband about the scene, about how to express why Edward never would have killed himself. And my husband said, like it was no big deal, "Of course he would never do that, because Edward knows what it's like to be left behind." And I fell over because he had said the perfect and right answer. So, this is the story of why I'm happy I married my husband, even though sometimes he drives me crazy. Everything was worth it, for that line. :)