The Perks of Being a Wallflower

by Stephen Chbosky

But the amazing thing was that it wasn’t a bad sad at all. It was just something that made everyone look around at each other and know that they were there. Sam and Patrick looked at me. And I looked at them. And I think they knew. Not anything specific really. They just knew. And I think that’s all you can ever ask from a friend. That’s

all the great writers used to wear suits all the time.

guess she didn’t know how much she talked or how much I listen.

when I met someone I thought was as beautiful as the song, I should give it to that person.

Once on a yellow piece of paper with green lines he wrote a poem And he called it “Chops” because that was the name of his dog And that’s what it was all about And his teacher gave him an A and a gold star And his mother hung it on the kitchen door and read it to his aunts That was the year Father Tracy took all the kids to the zoo And he let them sing on the bus And his little sister was born with tiny toenails and no hair And his mother and father kissed a lot And the girl around the corner sent him a Valentine signed with a row of X’s and he had to ask his father what the X’s meant And his father always tucked him in bed at night And was always there to do it Once on a piece of white paper with blue lines he wrote a poem And he called it “Autumn” because that was the name of the season And that’s what it was all about And his teacher gave him an A and asked him to write more clearly And his mother never hung it on the kitchen door because of its new paint And the kids told him that Father Tracy smoked cigars

And left butts on the pews And sometimes they would burn holes That was the year his sister got glasses with thick lenses and black frames And the girl around the corner laughed when he asked her to go see Santa Claus And the kids told him why his mother and father kissed a lot And his father never tucked him in bed at night And his father got mad when he cried for him to do it. Once on a paper torn from his notebook he wrote a poem And he called it “Innocence: A Question” because that was the question about his girl And that’s what it was all about And his professor gave him an A and a strange steady look And his mother never hung it on the kitchen door because he never showed her That was the year that Father Tracy died And he forgot how the end of the Apostle’s Creed went And he caught his sister making out on the back porch And his mother and father never kissed or even talked And the girl around the corner wore too much makeup That made him cough when he kissed her but he kissed her anyway because that was the thing to do And at three A.M. he tucked himself into bed his father snoring soundly That’s why on the back of a brown paper bag he tried another poem And he called it “Absolutely Nothing” Because that’s what it was really all about And he gave himself an A and a slash on each damned wrist

And he hung it on the bathroom door because this time he didn’t think he c...

sled.

all those little kids are going to grow up someday. And all of those little kids are going to do the things that we do. And they will all kiss someone someday. But for now, sledding is enough.

think it would be great if sledding were always enough, but it isn’t.

Then, my mom told my brother to not use such language in front of me, which was strange considering I am probably the only one in the family with a friend who is gay.

And again my mom asked my brother not to use such language in front of me, which was strange again because I think I’m the only person in my family who’s ever been high. Maybe also my brother. I’m not sure. Definitely not my sister. Then again, maybe my whole family has been high, and we just don’t tell each other these things.

should point out, though, that my dad slowly started turning the Christmas music on the radio to a deafening volume.

swear to God, we almost died.

It is important to say “sir” at these moments.

Everyone in the car knew that this was probably the worst idea my dad ever had in his whole life.

And I made Aunt Helen a promise to only cry about important things because I would hate to think that crying as much as I do would make crying for Aunt Helen less than it is.

Anything to not feel like crying.

don’t know if you’ve ever felt like that. That you wanted to sleep for a thousand years. Or just not exist. Or just not be aware that you do exist. Or something like that. I think wanting that is very morbid, but I want it when I get like this. That’s why I’m trying not to think. I just want it all to stop spinning.

If this gets any worse, I might have to go back to the doctor. It’s getting that bad again.

and I felt so small.

And all the books you’ve read have been read by other people. And all the songs you’ve loved have been heard by other people. And that girl that’s pretty to you is pretty to other people. And you know that if you looked at these facts when you were happy, you would feel great because you are describing “unity.”

and for the first time in my life, I understand the end of that poem. And I never wanted to. You have to believe me.

Nobody can be as big as the Beatles

Sam added that nowadays a band or someone would compare themselves to the Beatles after the second album, and their own personal voice would be less from that moment on.

I had the best time I ever had in my whole life.

After I finished, I just laid around in my bed, looking at the ceiling, and I smiled because it was a nice kind of quiet.

So, I said, “Can you show me?” And she said, “Don’t be smart.”

wants to explore lesbian relationships. I asked her if she thought girls were pretty, and she looked at me like I was stupid and said, “That’s not the point.”

She said I was the most sensitive boy she’d ever met, which I didn’t understand because really all I did was not interrupt her.

And then I thought that it was about time for me to stop thinking because it wasn’t doing my sister any good.

And how she really wasn’t fat. And how she was actually very pretty.

My sister was the one who told me where babies come from.

and this was the first time anyone ever counted on me for anything.

guess that’s natural, but I’m not sure why.

she hated everything her parents loved, except for brandy.

how difficult bras are.

“What’s up?” And I don’t know what to say because the only thing new in my life is my walk home,

And then she starts talking, and she doesn’t stop for a long time. She’s been doing this all week. That and picking lint off my clothes.

so I put down the phone, went to the bathroom, and when I came back, she was still talking.

I just don’t want to be another thing Mary Elizabeth is in charge of.

After she got done talking about it that time, I didn’t think I’d ever really need to read it myself. Even if I wanted to.

the White Album.

“Kiss the prettiest girl in the room on the lips.” That’s when I chose to be honest. In retrospect, I probably could not have picked a worse time. The silence started after I stood up (since Mary Elizabeth was sitting right next to me). By the time I had knelt down in front of Sam and kissed her, the silence was unbearable. It

“It’s too bad you’re not gay.”

And then I said, “You know, Patrick? If I were gay, I’d want to date you.”

Something really is wrong with me. And I don’t know what it is.

he’d try to call me if he could find the time. So far, he hasn’t.

I know that I brought this all on myself. I know that I deserve this. I’d do anything not to be this way. I’d do anything to make it up to everyone.

And to not have to take the medicine he gives me,