The Rudest Book Ever

by Shwetabh Gangwar

A person brought up on what to think tends to follow ideas, ideologies and ways of living that echo a relationship with familiarity.

A person brought up on how to think tends to question, filter and may abandon ideas, ideologies and ways of living that echo a relationship with familiarity.

Learning of any kind that involves zero investment of your thinking produces only imitation.

Specialness is the badge of realisation you earn. It may seem very simple to you, but this thinking can change the course of your life. Any achievement dictates you have created or mastered something. This means that not only did you gain in terms of knowledge, but you built habits of discipline, hard work, prioritising and focusing—habits that will serve you in almost all aspects of life.

You need to make it completely clear in your mind that others recognising you, giving you attention, a moment of their time, is not you being treated as somebody special. You translate that into specialness because you hardly ever feel good about yourself.

The point is, if you rely on others to feel special, then that may become the norm in your life, then a habit and, after that, a crippling need.

Whatever the case may be, the right to feel special must be earned and must only be yours to give.

If you need somebody else to tell you that you are special, then you have not done anything to earn it in your own mind.

Whatever I do, I do it for myself, because I want to prove to myself I can do it, recognising that whatever you do in turn impacts the world.

Those who hold prizes, positions and power are sources to learn from—and nothing else. You know nothing about their lives except for their abilities. Admire the fact that they have those abilities, and leave it at that.

One can simply close their eyes and ask themselves, Why am I special? What have I done in my life?, and get a clear answer. In case you feel dissatisfied, then you have the option to earn it. Nobody gives it to you, you have to take it. But that’s the hard part, earning it.

Specialness then becomes a collection of skills, and feeling special is the sensation felt on upgrading in life after having mastered a skill.

Perceptions matter, my friend, the way you look at something matters a lot.

Those who are able to find out what they want to do in life chase after greatness to prove to themselves that they are great at what they do. With time, they realise they don’t need anybody’s approval, as doing what they want to do gives them purpose, and fulfilling that purpose gives them satisfaction and a meaningful life.

You know a lot of sensible things, but the reason why you don’t apply them is because you don’t understand them.

Always remember: your job is not to understand people, but to understand and take care of yourself.

rejections are a normal thing, and I don’t have to take them personally, because people are weird. Who knows what’s going on in their heads—it’s not my job to find out.

I am not going to expect anything from them. I know practically nothing about their life. I am going to observe and wait for real data to show up.

People say a lot of shit to sound amazing.

Therefore, don’t outright buy the nice-sounding bullshit they say.

Observe whether it reflects in their choices as well. Choices, specifically, reveal the thought process of that person because, in making any choice, a person is also rejecting the other available options.

Whoever you are, or however you try to appear in front of people, manipulates your perception of people as well. For example, I am nice, therefore others must be nice as well.

Changing jobs feels like a new challenge; it involves a new environment, new people, new tasks, and the word ‘new’ brings a strong feeling of uncertainty to you.

The essence behind real winning is not giving up, no matter what badges and medals society is handing out.

Real winning requires your focus on neither winning nor losing, but upon learning.

Make the fact that failures, rejections and losses are normal a foundational principle upon which your brain works.

If you decide that you want it, then nobody can stop you. The only downside of failing is that your path may become longer, but you’re not dying in the next five years. You have the time, so focus on building that skill no matter where you are.

Success depends entirely on your preparation.

like that. We are living in the age of modern advertising in which humans are the products.

Attractiveness should only be an entry-level qualification; it shouldn’t be a deciding factor.

The last part is who you are professionally, which you can find out by asking these questions: What is my ambition? (What do you want to become exactly? Where do you want to reach?) What are my current goals? (Short-term and long-term goals to actualise the ambition mentioned above.) What is the routine I need to achieve my goals? (Doesn’t need explanation.) What are my dreams? (Why do you want to achieve that?) What is the nature of the line of work I have chosen? (How demanding is it? What’s the scope for relaxation? At what age and with what skillset would you have achieved credible respect in your field or workplace?)

People are weird. It has nothing to do with you.

We are happiness-junkies. People have left long, stable relationships or cheated on their partners because they met someone new who excites them—that’s how much of a happiness-junkie people can be.

The more you chase after feeling good, the more your ass is going to be kicked by life because, in doing so, you ignore all those important things you need to do.

The more you focus on thinking, the better the decisions you make keeping in mind not feelings, but long-term, stable results.

Manipulation tends to seriously fuck with your ability to make a rational choice. Manipulation feeds on weaknesses and vulnerabilities. Anything that is built on targeting your weakness and naivety, and making you its customer, is fucking vile because it doesn’t care about you at all.

People tend to realise the importance of the category ‘value’ when they look back on their lives and say, You know, I could have done this. I know I could have. I had what it takes in me, but I wasted my time doing stupid shit.

It’s one of the worst feelings, knowing you could have controlled and changed the outcome of something that now you regret: If only I had realised it at the right time. There is no known deadline for the ‘right time’, only the truth that it will come.

Always remember: the true test of any idea is not its popularity, but how deeply it makes you think.

People go away, they don’t give a shit about you, people give a shit about themselves; so you better start giving a shit about yourself the right way.

as far as friendship is concerned, a single person who truly gives a shit about you can replace thousands who claim friendship. So, you know whom to keep.

Before dragging yourself down or someone else down, always remind yourself they haven’t lived a day in your shoes, and you haven’t in theirs.

But time and time again, never forget, people are most interested in their own shit. They are busy with their own shit. And they are constantly thinking about their own shit.

People are gonna do whatever the fuck they want. You get to control what you do and how you think—that’s your only privilege.

Letting go can be boiled down to two simple things: You can’t please everyone. You can’t control anyone.

To quote Mike Tyson again: Everyone that you fight is not your enemy and everyone who helps you is not your friend.

A degree is a certificate of skills; therefore, someone with degrees is a person skilled in those subjects, not a fucking thinker. And without the ability to think critically and creatively, people largely remain unimaginative skilled workers.

We are humans. We are really competent in some things, and totally suck in a lot of other things. We are both competent and incompetent at the same time.

If you know what you want in life, then you wouldn’t care about what others have.

your ego can make you believe a thousand things about yourself, and if you acted based on those beliefs, you would be a fucking moron in the eyes of people who know better.