The Rudest Book Ever

by Shwetabh Gangwar

Having to do something becomes a duty you have to fulfil. Wanting to do something is a choice.

This is a highly misplaced argument because it assumes that everybody who is successful must be deeply in love with what they do.

These people are your heroes because they display an impressive standard of consistent hard work, and through that hard work have achieved expertise in their fields.

You believe in them because you know they are not the type to give up.

Winning is not a single event, it’s a continuing process.

As long as you feel insanely happy about winning, you’re going to feel intolerably miserable with losses.

Earn specialness by becoming capable.

Once you have decided to become capable, start seeing whatever you are doing as a challenge. The mindset of looking at things as challenges appeals directly to your ego.

Real winning requires your focus on neither winning nor losing, but upon learning.

You start seeing whatever you are learning from the point of view of utility, opportunity and ability.

what’s the use of what you are learning?

how can you use what you are learning?

Where is the geographic hub for opportunities for this skill? Thinking in terms of opportunity gives you ambition. Ambition gives you seriousness.

how well can you do what you are learning?

Real winning is a journey.

And once you fail in one of those things, you give up the entire venture altogether.

Focus on learning, which would suggest that you get a degree from wherever that subject is taught.

As long as you’re alive and functioning, the chance of getting back on top and amongst the greatest exists.

The only downside of failing is that your path may become longer, but you’re not dying in the next five years.

Success depends entirely on your preparation.

But at the end, you win by becoming too good to be ignored.

Your emotions are focused less on feeling miserable and more on conducting an investigation.

First, you take ownership of the failure.

I deserve this. Whatever impact this failure causes, I deserve and take responsibility for it.

Was your focus clouded by emotional entanglements?

After all, blaming something is much easier than applying common sense.

What you ought to be looking for is perspectives on your situation.

Your ego doesn’t allow you to openly seek help regarding rejection out of a fear of exposing your vulnerabilities.

The problem with unsolicited advice is that it lacks the seriousness required to solve your problem.

They give you information that is based on what they think, what they want to do, and what they probably do.

We are living in the age of modern advertising in which humans are the products.

Your reality is not a movie.

Your friends are not going to be a group of extremely good-looking people who have funny things to say every five seconds.

What exists is the fact that you love watching fantasy.

The truth is, you don’t have real data on why you got rejected. In the absence of any data, you let your insecurities fill in all the reasons why you got rejected.

You don’t know the nature of their wants, why they want what they want, their influences, degree of intelligence, degree of experience, who they think they are, who they actually are, and if they know who they actually are. You don’t have any data. Therefore, rejection from people should mean jack-shit to you.

Being rejected by someone is not a statement on you.

When you start to care about ‘who you are’ in a realistic manner, instead of blindly falling for people, you start caring about who they are.

What is the routine I need to achieve my goals?

It is what they have done and have been doing that shows you who they are.

Do the choices, decisions and actions they have made in their past and are making in the present ensure the safety and support of your current purpose in life?

But what you do have is the power to find out who you are, and fix and develop whatever you think is weak.

Things that make you happy in general, and things you specifically enjoy, are two different experiences.

What makes your self happy is knowing clearly what activities give you joy, and what would give you satisfaction in the long run.

The truth is, life doesn’t revolve around happiness. Life is a lot of things that have nothing to do with happiness.

Ideally, an intelligent person would be one who is more thinking-based than feeling-based.

You do work a lot—except it’s in the direction of gathering information which is of no use to your real work.

I want you to start looking at whatever you do with an assumption: you would be fine without everything you currently believe makes you happy.

Manipulation tends to seriously fuck with your ability to make a rational choice.

They tend not to give instant happiness, but help you get closer to peacefulness.