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For the restless souls searching for some calm within the chaos and for the ones looking for a little chaos to temper the calm.
“A secret for a secret?”
The best way to heal is to get rid of the rot, even if it hurts at first.
My mouth is suddenly dry and my nipples harden as the memories wash over me. Such a pretty boy. So nicely dressed, so polite. So very, very respectful. But good God, get that man’s clothes off and get him into a bed, and it’s a whole different story. One I’d like to write a few more chapters in, or maybe an entire novel—a long one. I took the Boy Scout out of the polo and unleashed a very dirty man.
“So it had nothing to do with my performance?” “No. Your stamina is legendary and your performance was exemplary. You probably devoted a good hour or more to providing oral pleasure, which is more than I can say for any guy I’ve ever been with before.”
It’s me he should be concerned about, because as much as we might be mutually off limits, there’s clearly an attraction we’re both fighting. Kingston seems a lot more capable of keeping himself in check than I am.
By now I’m used to his excessive caution: signaling before he even leaves the parking spot, braking as soon as the light turns yellow (even though he has more than enough time to pass through the intersection before it turns red), driving exactly the speed limit, if not a couple of miles an hour under it. He’s worse than a ninety-year-old, and I kind of love it.
“King and Queenie? That’s epic.”
“I’d like her to keep believing I’m a Boy Scout, even if you and I know that isn’t always true.”
wish you could see yourself through my eyes, Queenie. Then you might have some idea as to how incredible you really are.” Our gazes lock and hold.
“But I want to do things in the right order, and so far it’s all been very backward. Let me put the effort in, Queenie. I want to show you you’re worth it.”
“You may need to set some parameters for me, my queen, so I know how out of control I’m allowed to get here.” I shiver in anticipation at his low warning tone and this new endearment. “No parameters.” He pulls back, lips temptingly close. “None?” I bite the edge of his jaw, enjoying the slight sting and tug at the base of my skull when his fingers tighten in my hair. “I’ve been waiting for months to get back into your bedroom.” I arch up and nibble his bottom lip. “Lock the Boy Scout in the closet and let yourself off your leash, King.”
“I want you to listen to me, Queenie. You are not mediocre. You are amazing and the world is at your fingertips. The sooner you realize that, the easier it will be for you to shine like you’re supposed to.”
see you, Queenie. Don’t let anyone tell you that you’re not worthy.”
The thing about happiness is that it isn’t meant to last. Life is a roller coaster: slow climbs to the top, a brief balance in euphoria, and then a steep drop that leaves you screaming and gasping for breath.
“Channel the anger on the ice. Every puck coming at you is that fucker’s balls.”
“You can push me away as much as you want, but it’s not going to stop me from wanting you. I love you because of all these perceived flaws you have, not in spite of them. I know you’ve been let down a lot, and I don’t plan to be one of those people in your life. Give us a chance to get through this together, Queenie. Let me catch you when you fall. Let me be your safe place to land.”
Queenie. I want all your dark secrets to be mine to keep. I want all your pieces, all the things that make you who you are. I don’t care if you think you’re bent or broken; let me love all of you.”
She hugs me, and suddenly I understand what a real mother is supposed to be. Not perfect, but protective. Willing to make mistakes and own them because sometimes love outweighs logic.
“Yes. It’s a yes. I’ll bring my chaos into your calm.” I place a soft kiss on her lips. “There’s no place I’d rather be than the eye of your storm.”
I’m not afraid of failing anymore, because no matter what, I have the most amazing man at my side. He’s always there to catch me when I fall and to celebrate every success, so making this choice is easy, because I know it’s what’s best not just for me but for our family.
He’s the calm to my storm. My still lake at dawn. My king.
