I recognize now that exclusion, especially at the level and frequency at which I experienced it, is traumatic. Although at the time it didn’t feel out of the bounds of my normal, everyday experience—I can see that constantly coping with it definitely impacted me and it never stopped being painful. Interestingly, though, my reaction to being left out was not to become angry or aggressive toward people, which is a common reaction to feeling excluded, especially when you feel you lack control over your life. Perhaps this was due to the fact that because I didn’t accept my lack of control, I
...more
