The Falling in Love Montage

by Ciara Smyth

I don’t believe in love at first sight or soul mates or any of that guff you see in the movies.

I was the cross me once, cold shoulder forever type.

It was just me and my cats and I would have to learn to be OK with that.

There it was. The pity.

But why confront today what you can argue about over breakfast tomorrow?

all I could think about was (1) what it might be like to kiss someone with a lip ring, (2) if she had any other piercings, and (3) whether she’d let me find out.)

Well, it’s not an affair if they’re divorced, Saoirse,

“I’m sorry, but I’m too pretty for prison and I just don’t think our thirteen-year-old daughter has the upper-body strength to strangle you,”

Was this what being straight was like? A boy in your bedroom making a mess? Not for the first time, I thanked God I was a lesbian.