The New Queer Conscience (Pocket Change Collective)

by Adam Eli

Queer people anywhere are responsible for queer people everywhere.

Allow me to introduce the platinum rule: Treat everyone how you want your best friend to be treated.

The Platinum Rule is: treat others how they want to be treated. Term "platinum rule" 1979 possibly coined by communication researcher Milton Bennett in a paper "Overcoming the Golden Rule: Sympathy and Empathy". Concept goes further back with criticism of "golden rule" by a number of philosophers. In 1996 Troy Alessandra and Michael O'Conners write the book "The Platinum Rule" for running a successful business. I've been trying to live by the Platinum Rule for 15+ years - today i researched it's origins.

That means everyone can only truly understand, speak to, and represent their own experience. You can offer advice and resources, but ultimately, only someone who has directly experienced an issue can be in the best position to provide a solution.

Do NOT offer advice unless asked or you are teaching group, giving a speech, workshop, similar. It's A form of microaggression and should be avoided. Think twice and take time before offering resources as it's insulting and condescending to assume the person doesn't already know about resources. Always wait to be asked to help and ask questions to determine if they are aware. After stepping back and thinking I try to say "I'm sure you know about x resourse but in case you haven't I , friends, and family found it helpful.

We do not qualify, deny, or question a person’s belonging to the queer community. No one queer experience is more valid than another.

Showing up for other marginalized groups by going to protests, donating money, and sharing resources is not a selfless act or charity. It is the key to our continued survival.

Activist group Queer Nation says in its manifesto: “Let yourself be angry.” Let’s make sure to use that weapon, that anger, and that power on our oppressors, not one another.

Showing up, applauding, and supporting queer people is a radical and vital act of self-love in a world that constantly tells us we are not enough.