The Buddhist on Death Row: How One Man Found Light in the Darkest Place

by David Sheff

People should ask themselves two questions every night before bed: “If I die tonight in my sleep… What have I done with my life? Have I been of benefit or have I caused harm?”

She explained that karma boils down to one relevant fact and one vital question. The fact: “This is where I am today.” The question: “How will I use it?”

And he pointed him toward the central paradox of the faith: that the more one accepts suffering, the less one suffers.

the measure of a Buddhist’s progress isn’t how a person avoids falling, because falls are inevitable; the true measure is how they bounce back.

He told her about a mantra he’d created that he repeated to himself throughout the day. He used the mantra—“How can I be helpful? How can I be helpful?”—to guide him. “When I’m drifting off into some worry, the question brings me back where I need to be.”

Susan asked the men to close their eyes, and she led them in the Equanimity Meditation. In a slow, measured, even voice, she said, “Start imagining someone in front of you who has neither helped nor harmed you, someone you neither like nor dislike—someone you have a neutral feeling for. Think to yourself, ‘That person wants happiness, health, and good fortune, just like I do. They do not want suffering, hardship, famine, just like me.’ Can you recognize a neutral feeling, a feeling of equanimity, neither aversion nor attraction? When you feel this equanimity to any degree, touch your hand to your heart, breathe in, and silently say to yourself, ‘This feeling is equanimity, and it blesses me and those around me with peace and stillness.’ ” She continued, “Now imagine someone in front of you whom you like. Think to yourself, ‘That person wants happiness, health, and good fortune, just like me. They do not want suffering, hardship, famine, just like me.’ Can you feel the same equanimity and neutrality toward them? Breathe in and out gently and evenly three times. Slowly scan your body from top of head to bottom of feet. If you find your breath shortening, note the location in your body where the breath encounters tightness. What memories are coming up for you right now? What emotions are coming up right now? When you feel any degree of equanimity toward the person you like, silently touch your heart and say, ‘This feeling is equanimity, and it blesses me and those around me w...