Tell them how the behavior affected you. This we’ve discussed. Tell them the behavior is not meeting their apparent goals. In the fable portion of this book, Mick wants Kendra to work faster. Allie has to point out this has the opposite effect. Your behavior may meet your goals, but it is costly to you. For example, being so persistent in pushing your agenda that another person might dig in out of sheer annoyance. The pushy individual may get a poor reputation and find it hard to accomplish goals that take cooperation. Ask, “In what ways am I part of the problem?” Perhaps Kendra could say,
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