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“You ever just get so sick of how people talk?” She asked out of nowhere. “Hearing the same damn stories over and over? Like some people are just video game characters and only have so many lines of pre-programmed dialogue.”
I had forgotten how nice it was to be held.
I wasn’t sure why it felt like it cost me something to say nice things. Or rather, why it felt like sharing would put me at risk for humiliation.
“I told you, I'm not great with words, but I thought I made it clear from the beginning that I only wanted you to feel better. I wanted the world to see the real you, how you’re just as capable as anybody else. That your accent doesn’t make you trash. If I ever made you feel like less than anyone else it was only because I can't communicate my thoughts clearly.
women had enough odds stacked against them. You’d think they’d band together rather than tear each other down.
Does trying to put her down make you feel better about your own life? Are you bored with your life or feel like you don’t have sufficient accomplishments? Are you that miserable you feel compelled to make others feel bad? Or are you just mean-spirited?”
“Because I’ve spent plenty of time with this woman. I’ve seen her help people who don’t deserve it. I’ve seen her try to better herself. I’ve seen her take care of people who don’t deserve it. Not once have I heard her say mean things to someone just to hurt them.”
“People are not their occupations or their pasts. They’re a culmination of a thousand different things and worthy of respect until they’ve lost it.
She couldn’t find the right words when I had. It was an unparalleled moment on all accounts. I wanted to savor it.
My soul was awake around Suzie. More than around anybody else. She drove me crazy. She shook me up. I had no idea who I was around her anymore.
How could I once again be so caught up in a moment, only to find I was totally alone?
I knew it was a bad habit of mine to leave the room when I couldn’t speak. But better to leave than stay and say the wrong thing.
“I just don’t understand why nobody ever thinks I’m good enough.
“Don’t apologize for feeling things freely. Just because I’m bad at it, doesn’t mean I don’t envy it.”
“Your issue is not that you don’t feel, Ford. Your issue is that you feel too much.” She smiled and put her head back on my racing heart.
“Just because everybody says things about you, doesn’t make them true. You get to decide who you are.”
I swallowed. I wanted to say more. I liked her so much. I liked everything about her. I liked her dangerous, scary amounts.
He was stiff as I hugged him. That was okay. I’d give him all the hugs. He didn’t have to hug back.
a Ford and Suzie burrito.
Could it be possible she didn’t understand how much I felt for her?
But it’s up to you. You have to change your life. You can’t rely on anybody else.”
Loving means putting someone else first. It means wanting them to be their best selves.
What about yourself? You love yourself? You give yourself your best chances? Nobody else can change your life but you. Nobody.
