A Confederacy of Dunces

by John Kennedy Toole

“This city is famous for its gamblers, prostitutes, exhibitionists, anti-Christs, alcoholics, sodomites, drug addicts, fetishists, onanists, pornographers, frauds, jades, litterbugs, and lesbians, all of whom are only too well protected by graft. If you have a moment, I shall endeavor to discuss the crime problem with you, but don’t make the mistake of bothering me.”

dust a bit,” Ignatius told the policeman. “In addition, I am at the moment writing a lengthy indictment against our century. When my brain begins to reel from my literary labors, I make an occasional cheese dip.”

some rural rednecks might toss bombs at the bus.

“Canned food is a perversion,” Ignatius said. “I suspect that it is ultimately very damaging to the soul.”

“There sure was plenty balls at that ball, but I still got my honor,”

Abelman, unfortunately, was apparently a rather petty person, a man too small to accept a little criticism, a hypersensitive molecule of a human.

“The scent of soot and carbon in your hair excites me with suggestions of glamorous Gotham.