Catch-22

by Joseph Heller

strangers he didn’t know shot at him with cannons every time he flew up into the air to drop bombs on them, and it wasn’t funny at all.

the only people permitted to ask questions were those who never did. Soon the only people attending were those who never asked questions, and the sessions were discontinued altogether, since Clevinger, the corporal and Colonel Korn agreed that it was neither possible nor necessary to educate people who never questioned anything.

But that was war. Just about all he could find in its favor was that it paid well and liberated children from the pernicious influence of their parents.

“I think I’d like to live like a vegetable and make no important decisions.” “What kind of vegetable, Danby?” “A cucumber or a carrot.” “What kind of cucumber? A good one or a bad one?” “Oh, a good one, of course.” “They’d cut you off in your prime and slice you up for a salad.” Major Danby’s face fell. “A poor one, then.” “They’d let you rot and use you for fertilizer to help the good ones grow.” “I guess I don’t want to live like a vegetable, then,” said Major Danby with a smile of sad resignation.