My Dark Vanessa
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Read between June 27 - June 29, 2020
2%
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That seems the likely ending to this love story: me dropping everything and doing anything, devoted as a dog, as he takes and takes and takes.
3%
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Mom says dwelling in your feelings is no way to live, that there will always be something to be upset about and the secret to a happy life is not to let yourself be dragged down into negativity. She doesn’t understand how satisfying sadness can be; hours spent rocking in the hammock with Fiona Apple in my ears make me feel better than happy.
Sandy
Moms always know best.
5%
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My fall semester schedule is Honors French, Honors Biology, AP World History, Geometry (the non-math-genius kind; even Mrs. Antonova calls it “geometry for dummies”), an elective called U.S. Politics and Media where we watch CNN and talk about the upcoming presidential election, and Honors American Literature.
Sandy
This sounds like my high school class schedule!
Emily
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Emily
same!
Sandy
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Sandy
Haha, my favorite part is knowing that non-honors Geometry is the "non-math-genius kind" because same.
6%
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“If there’s one thing you take away from this class, it should be that the world is made of endlessly intersecting stories, each one valid and true.”
6%
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“The first day is always so long.”
Sandy
This goes for school, work and just about everything. The first day will always be long.
16%
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Sometimes it feels like that’s all I’m doing every time I reach out—trying to haunt, to drag him back in time, asking him to tell me again what happened. Make me understand it once and for all. Because I’m still stuck here. I can’t move on.
Sandy
This is devastating.
19%
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He says that by believing our lives have endless possibilities, we stave off the horrifying truth that to live is merely to move forward through time while an internal clock counts down to a final, fatal moment.
Emily liked this
22%
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“People will risk everything for a little bit of something beautiful,” Strane says, with so much sincerity in his voice there are ripples of laughter around the seminar table.
52%
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To be groomed is to be loved and handled like a precious, delicate thing.
Sandy
I shivered reading this.
53%
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My breath catches at the thought of what would happen if I spilled a line of gasoline over all this evidence, from thirty-two all the way back to fifteen. The wreckage I’d cause if I dropped a match and let it burn.
Sandy
This is poetically beautiful.