The Secret Lives of Introverts: Inside Our Hidden World

by Jenn Granneman

If you’re an introvert like me, you may have secrets inside you, too. You have thoughts that you don’t have the words to express and big ideas that no one else sees.

I kept my secret thoughts to myself. I didn’t let on when I wished I could be alone in my bedroom instead of at the mall, surrounded by people. I tried to be the person I thought I should be—fun-loving and always ready to hang out.

Introversion is a temperament, which is different from your personality; temperament refers to your inborn traits that organize how you approach the world, while personality can be defined as the pattern of behavior, thoughts, and emotions that make you an individual. It can take years to build a personality, but your temperament is something you’re born with.

But the most important thing to know about being an introvert is that there’s nothing wrong with you. You’re not broken because you’re quiet. It’s okay to stay home on a Friday night instead of going to a party. Being an introvert is a perfectly normal “thing” to be.

Whatever the reason, as an introvert, you crave intimate moments and deep connections—and those usually aren’t found in a crowd.

Meaningful interactions are the introvert’s antidote to social burnout.

Because introverts are not as energized by potential rewards, they may find levels of stimulation that are rewarding for extroverts to be simply tiring or annoying,

Because of our limited “people” energy, we don’t let just anyone into our lives. But we treasure the relationships we do have. If you’re in our inner circle, know that you’re very special to us.