Sorry I'm Late, I Didn't Want to Come: One Introvert's Year of Saying Yes

by Jessica Pan

“When we watch The X Factor,” Kate goes on, “what we love the best are the people who are really shit. Right? We love that. When they’re great, it’s good, too, but what’s great about them being shit is not that they’re shit but that they’re trying really hard and then they’re shit,”

I learned a lot about loneliness. As an adult, sometimes if you’re lucky, you have close friends from childhood nearby, but when you move away from home or outgrow your old friends, you have to find your people. And it’s so hard. It can take years. You have to actively go out and get them. You’ll need them for when life gets dark or one of your loved ones has just gone into the operating room for major surgery and you’re standing in the hospital corridor, scared out of your mind and you really, really need someone to sit beside you. But once you have these friends, you get to keep them. Even if they move to, say, Paris or Portland, they’re still yours. And everyone gets lonely. Everyone I met talked about it. It sneaks up on you, especially if you don’t protect yourself from it.