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“My father used to say: never call a meeting until the outcome is a foregone conclusion.”
he knew that his life would be a long winter without Caris.
The worst negotiator in the world is a man who believes he’s clever, Caris thought.
His heart still beat faster when he saw her, and he was happier talking to her than doing anything else in the world.
When he had felt love, it had taken him over, making him feel rage and resentment as well as lust and tenderness. Now he felt interested, flattered, and titillated, but he was not out of control.
an appropriate punishment for those who robbed churches: he would be flayed alive. His skin would be cut off him, while he was fully conscious, and he would bleed to death.
We’re all good when it suits us, he used to say: that doesn’t count. It’s when you want so badly to do something wrong—when you’re about to make a fortune from a dishonest deal, or kiss the lovely lips of your neighbor’s wife, or tell a lie to get yourself out of terrible trouble—that’s when you need the rules. ‘Your integrity is like a sword,’ he would say. ‘You shouldn’t wave it until you’re about to put it to the test.’ Not that he knew anything about swords.”
priests were not supposed to shed blood, a rule they acknowledged cursorily by using blunt weapons on the battlefield.
“The day I see fear in his eyes when he looks at me, he shall have anything he likes.” “Is that so important to you?” Merthin said incredulously. “That people fear you?” “It’s the most important thing in the world,” said Ralph.
“You don’t make it sound very exciting.” She smiled. “I assume you already know about the good parts: feeling loved and adored; knowing there’s one person in the world who will always be on your side; getting into bed every night with someone strong and tender who wants to fuck you—that’s happiness, for me.”
“So why do you want to go to Wales?” He just stared at her with that intense look, and she realized that the fear she had detected in him was for her. He was terrified that she would die. Tears came to her eyes. She remembered what Madge had said: “Knowing there’s one person in the world who will always be on your side.” Merthin tried to look after her, no matter what she did. She thought of poor Madge, blasted by grief at the loss of the one who was always on her side.
It’s wonderful to lie with a man, the best thing in the world, but only if you love each other truly.
“Sad and angry. I seem to have wasted half my life waiting for Caris.” “Love is never wasted.”
“I believe that what I do becomes part of me,” she said. “When I’m brave and strong, and care for children and the sick and the poor, I become a better person. And when I’m cruel, or cowardly, or tell lies, or get drunk, I turn into someone less worthy, and I can’t respect myself. That’s the divine retribution I believe in.”
“You’re a brave woman to do this work,” he said. “It will probably kill you.” “I know,” she said, turning to face him again. “But this is my destiny. I can’t run away from people who need me.”
He would have used an intermediary, someone loyal, ambitious, and with absolutely no scruples. I came across such men in Florence, hanging around the doge’s palace. They’re the scum of the earth.”
Lawyers of course lol
What he was not saying was that a man was entitled, by law, to kill his wife if he caught her committing adultery.
“Ah, Father Prior, you are above such things, of course. We do not aspire to your intellectual heights. We do not try to understand the body’s humors.
“You see, all that I ever held dear has been taken from me,” she said in a matter-of-fact tone. “And when you’ve lost everything—” Her facade began to crumble, and her voice broke, but she made herself carry on. “When you’ve lost everything, you’ve got nothing to lose.”
He shook his head. “These are the easy questions: clean water, airy rooms, a reception hall.” “And what are the difficult ones?” He turned to face her. There were snowflakes in his red beard. He said: “Questions like: Does she still love me?” They stared at each other for a long moment. Caris was happy.
They both had realized, belatedly, that their drawn-out love affair, which they had imagined to be a private drama, had been entertaining the citizens of Kingsbridge for years, and everyone wanted to celebrate its happy ending.
“But then it will be highly dangerous for us to attend the sick!” Oonagh answered him. “We have no fear,” she said. “We look forward to death. For us, it is the longed-for reunion with Christ.” “Yes, of course,” said Sime. The next day, all the monks left Kingsbridge.
“You don’t understand,” Annet sobbed. “I understand you all too well,” Gwenda said. “No, you don’t,” Annet said. She wiped her eyes and gave Gwenda a surprisingly direct, candid look. “You don’t understand that you have won. He’s yours. You don’t know how he adores you, respects you, admires you. You don’t see the way he looks at you when you’re speaking to someone else.”
Merthin nodded. “Half the town thinks you’re an angel already.” “I’m not, though,” she said. “No,” he said with the familiar grin that she loved so much. “But you’re the closest they’ve seen.” The wind blustered suddenly. Caris grabbed Merthin. He held her tightly, standing confidently on spread feet. The gust died away as quickly as it had come, but Merthin and Caris remained locked together, standing there at the top of the world, for a long time afterward.
