You don’t have to make eighteen pieces of toast to see which cut will suit your child. In fact, it’s not helpful. First off, you’re completely setting up your child to expect you to fix everything. Second, you’re not allowing the actual feeling. You’re unconsciously saying, Don’t feel that. Here. I’ll hurry up and fix it so you’re not feeling the thing. Ah. But how to let the emotions flow without stopping life in its tracks? Take a break, take a minute. “I can see this has made you very angry. Why don’t you take a minute to settle and then we’ll figure out what to do.” I’m using “settle”
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