Mythos: The Greek Myths Retold (Stephen Fry's Great Mythology, #1)

by Stephen Fry

Now, you might be the kind of person who asks, ‘But who or what was there before Chaos?’ or ‘Who or what was there before the Big Bang? There must have been something.’ Well, there wasn’t.

Ouranos was revolted by them. Maybe he was most horrified by the thought that he, Lord of the Sky, could have fathered such strange and ugly things, but I think that like most hatred his revulsion was rooted in fear. Filled with disgust, he cursed them: ‘For offending my eyes, you shall never see light again!’ As he roared these furious words, he pushed them and the Cyclopes back into Gaia’s womb.

Bloody hell yikes

‘You look a mess, Tartarus.’ ‘What the hell do you want down here?’ ‘Shut up for once and I’ll tell you …’

I think he’s got some kind of man-crush on me. He copies my hairstyle and leans limply against trees and boulders looking miserable, melancholy and misunderstood. As if he’s waiting for someone to paint him or something.

bestie was having an emo phase before emo phases even existed. he would have loved MCR. 😔🎸🎧

‘Yes. Eventide. That is when your father will come to me, as he always does. He likes to –’ Kronos nodded curtly. He did not wish to know the details of his parents’ love-making.

Lol

FRAUS (from whom we derive the words ‘fraud’, fraudulent’ and ‘fraudster’).

Slay???

The blade, hissing through the air, sliced Ouranos’s genitals clean from his body.

Ouch.

hurled the package of genitals far, far from sight. Across the plains of Greece they flew and out over the darkening

Ok but imagine you are chhilling and then all of a sudden u just see a yknow flying through the air

A face far more beautiful than creation has yet seen or will ever see again.

Charles Leclerc?

They would not, despite their parentage, call themselves ‘Titans’. They would be gods. And not just gods, but the gods.

I’d like a choir of young girls to sing my praises in temples and a group of nymphs to walk the dogs and look after me and help protect me from men.’

Wouldn't we all

He must father the twelfth and final god. Or, to put it another way, his sex-crazed glance fell on yet another appetizing immortal.

‘Oh!’ he breathed, entranced. ‘What beautiful moo-moos.’ For all his precocity he was still not above baby-talk.

‘I’ve had an idea,’ was all he would tell her.

Being spoken to in superior tones by a day-old baby was another on his list of least favourite experiences.

‘I don’t know what to say.’ ‘You can say, “Thank you, Hermes,” and, “By all means keep the cattle, brother mine.” ’ ‘Thank you, Hermes! And by all means, yes, keep the cattle.’ ‘Kind of you, old man, but I actually only needed two. You can have the rest back.’

He has won. Yet he feels nothing.

‘Male and female?’ ‘Oh, good heavens no, just male.

Epimetheus and Pandora were very much in love. That could not be denied. Pandora’s beauty and attainments were such as to delight him every day, and in return his facile ability to live always for the moment and never to fret

Us :)

‘If that’s supposed to be Adamanthea with me there, you’ve got the proportions all wrong,’ he said. ‘Artistic licence,’

Love, as the Greeks understood, is complicated.

damn right, you should be paying to marry ME

example, it is worth mentioning the story of IPHIMEDIA, who was so in love with Poseidon that she would regularly sit by the shore, scooping up seawater and pouring it over her breasts and into her lap.

Simping frfr