Desperately Seeking Roommate

by Micalea Smeltzer

You might say I don’t need the mani-pedis, which might be true in theory, but I don’t need that kind of negativity from anyone in my life, so you can kindly fuck off.

“Welcome, mi casa is now su casa—but don’t think that means you can run a prostitution ring out of this place. I’m not your co-pimp.”