The Shadows Between Us

by Tricia Levenseller

The poets can say whatever they damned like. A woman’s worth is not decided by what’s between her legs but by what is in her mind.

“Have you ever been in love?” “No,” he says. “Not ever. What’s it like?” “Horrible.”

“I lied. You’re the most stunning thing to ever set foot in my palace.”

I would love you completely, wholly, as a woman ought to be loved. I won’t hide behind shadows. I won’t love you from afar. I won’t only take parts of you. I want all of you. Mind, body, soul. I want to be with you. Always.

“My little hellion. Quite the force to be reckoned with, aren’t you? Oh, say you’ll marry me, Alessandra!” I swallow, thoroughly confused. “You’re not going to hang me?” “Hang you?” he repeats, letting his hands fall to his sides. “The man did you wrong, Alessandra. Honestly, you’ve saved me the trouble of tracking him down and killing him myself.”

“I think that when you care enough for someone, you reach a point where it’s far more painful not to have him at all than to have him and risk losing him. You realize the risk is worth it. Because happiness, however short-lived, is always worth it.”

“You are worth it, Alessandra. I’m done living separately from everyone else. My parents’ murderers will finally be brought to justice. But even if they weren’t, I would still make this

“I want a life with you, Alessandra, one without the shadows between us.

Waiting. Not waiting. One lover. A hundred lovers. There should be no judgment either way. A woman is not defined by what she does or doesn’t do in the bedroom.

“But I knew before then. I was hurt, yes, but I was going to come back for you right before Xanthos approached me. I was in my mother’s sitting room, because I tried to imagine a future where that room wouldn’t be yours, and I couldn’t.”

You didn’t look at me like I was a king, someone to be respected and worshipped. You looked on me as a man. A man who says foolish things and makes terrible decisions. You made me remember what it is to be human.

“I haven’t earned it. I will never earn it. I could spend a million years trying to worship you, and I still wouldn’t be worthy of you.

“All the time in the world is worth nothing if I don’t get to spend it with you. “Forever yours, Kallias.”

I lose interest in everything sooner or later. Everything save you. Because in you, I found my match. In you, I found my equal.”