Deep Freeze (Virgil Flowers, #10)

by John Sandford

Virgil’s girlfriend, Frankie, had said, “You’ll come back with your balls glowing in the dark.” “Wrong, ignorant farm girl,” Virgil said. “The cooling water doesn’t touch the radioactive part. You could drink it.” “You know that for sure?” “Yeah, I looked it up,” Virgil said. They were taking down the Christmas tree, packing the glass ornaments into boxes of Styrofoam peanuts. “Besides, if my balls did glow in the dark, I’d have some light when I get up at night to pee.” “Or, even better,” she said, “you could lead Santa’s sleigh if something happened to Rudolph.” She was not only an ignorant farm girl but a wiseass.

“Undertime” was a concept widely used in state government: it was like overtime, but instead of working more, you worked less, while still getting paid. The real artists took undertime while on the clock for overtime, thus getting time-and-a-half for not working.

“You got a rental?” Johnson asked. “Yeah, a Prius.” “Jeez, that’s like driving an ice skate,” Johnson said. “Got those hard little tires . . . You better not be on the road if it starts snowing.”