If you aren’t asking questions, you haven’t acquired the skill yet. If you aren’t listening to the answers, you aren’t using the skill. The emotion scientist has a genuine desire to understand and acknowledges that all emotions are information. Until we understand the causes of emotion, we’ll never really be able to help ourselves, our kids, or our colleagues. Had either my mother or father been able to cope with my tantrums and reach out to me, maybe with a hug or some show of affection and acceptance, who knows how those scenes might have ended? If my mother had said something like “Okay,
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