The Twisted Ones

by T. Kingfisher

Bongo is an excellent watchdog, by which I mean that he will watch very alertly as the serial killer breaks into the house and skins me.

happy as long as he gets fed and people pet him. I wish I were a dog. One of the simple ones, like hounds. Border collies are too complicated.

“Haint blue,” they call it. The theory is that if a ghost comes up to the door, it’ll look up and see the blue ceiling and think it’s the sky, and drift up into it. I

Books on World War II appear spontaneously in any house that contains a man over a certain age. I believe that’s science.

felt like I was flipping through a stack of papers that said All work and no play… over and over again, but I hadn’t yet turned around to see Jack Nicholson standing there grinning at me.