Twice in a Blue Moon

by Christina Lauren

I don’t know why people think permanent denial is better than temporary disappointment.”

My heart is a tiny, anxious bird in my chest.

stand on. “Some people rise to the top on their own merit, and some people get there by stepping on heads.”

I struggle to not laugh. Laughing isn’t the right reaction here.

As much as I hate his approval, I know I crave it too.

wonder if there will ever be a time when I’ll stop trying so hard and embrace the welcome void of indifference.

But I don’t want to be the broken bird anymore.

how the color of my skin means that I can empathize, but I’ll never truly understand.

I can’t fall again and pick up my own pieces. I don’t have it in me.

It’s like when a friend breaks up with someone and tells you all the terrible things about them. They get back together but you’re just supposed to forget about it all?”

I’ll put up with a lot, but I won’t be someone’s mental cat toy.

I want every wish he ever makes to be for this. A penny in a fountain. The first star. An eyelash. Eleven eleven.

home isn’t always a space; it can be a person.

“Because he’s your dad. He should be better than that.” I shrug, feeling oddly numb. “Yeah, but he’s always shown me exactly who he is, and I just never want to believe it.”

“I want free-range, bottomless love.”