Where there should have been aspiration seeds blooming or urgent hopes detonating, all I had in my head was a pulsing asterisk. To this day I have no inkling as to what I care about the most. I care about everything equally until I care about so many things I get overwhelmed and care about nothing at all. When it comes to the single thing I want to focus the entire rest of my life on, it’s a muscle I don’t know how to flex. As if I’m a lightning bug that forgot how to turn its ass on.
