The Next Right Thing: A Simple, Soulful Practice for Making Life Decisions

by Emily P. Freeman

Desire is only toxic when we demand our desires be satisfied on our terms and in our timing. Knowing what we want and getting what we want are not necessarily the same thing.

decision. As a result, we live our lives as a shadow of our true selves, not fully knowing who we are and, in turn, who God is in us.

Jesus asked what he wanted without a promise of fulfillment.

In turn, here are three simple benefits you will discover when you take the time to name and know what you want in the presence of God.

all that negativity was I had a particular desire I had not yet named.

When that desire went unmet, I felt it. But I didn’t know why.

When I am honest with myself about what I most want, I must also confront the reality that what I most want I may not get. If

For the next twenty-four hours, practice pausing when someone asks your opinion on simple things, such as where to eat lunch, which outfit looks better, or what the order of events should be at the meeting, for example. Pausing is important no matter if your personality is hesitant or assertive. If you’re hesitant, the pause could serve as a good reminder: what you want matters.

Some good things can emerge from a pro/con list. It can help you work out what you actually think. Writing things down in a methodical fashion has a way of clearing the mind, allowing you to make sense of something you might otherwise have trouble deciphering.

Life Energy List (one day I’m going to come up with a better name for it). This list is preemptive, not reactive. It won’t eliminate your need to decide things when decisions come your way, but it could serve as a helpful filter for future decisions.

What was life-draining? What was life-giving?

You can get as specific as you want and break down your categories into as much detail as you want. There is no wrong way to do this as long as you practice reflecting on your life and getting honest about the things that bring life and the things that drain life. Some other categories you may choose to look at

Another thing to notice is that there may be things on your list that feel life-draining, but the result of that thing is actually life-giving.

This is a practice in collecting the clues from your life and getting them down on paper so that when opportunities, commitments, and requests come your way in the future, you will be able to consider them with information from your actual life rather than frantic speculation and last-minute pro/con lists.

Daily Examen, which

realized that this life I live is someone else’s boat. They look and long and wish for this. And so do I, until I remember I already have it. That glamorous life doesn’t really exist, and the ones who chase it discover quickly, It isn’t really here. Whoever named the boat knew that. All this stuff is never enough, not really.

There’s been a shift, something strong I can’t shake, an invitation I can’t fully decipher but one that’s growing like a wave beneath the surface. I want to write.

What does it mean when what was before you for so long is now behind you? What does it say about you, your commitments, your choices, and your identity when that thing you worked so hard for no longer seems like a good fit?

Essentialism is not about how to get more things done, it’s about how to get the right things done.

Two, schedule a listening day.

The point of this day is not necessarily to make your decision but to remember who you are.

Three, quit something.

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens: a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance, a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing, a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away, a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak, a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace.

I Used to Be a Human Being

This morning she’ll hold her secrets close.

First, take one thing on your mind that feels overwhelming, a thing that causes you to flit into the future and make imaginary plans or fret over potential worry. State what it is. Then turn it into a question and add today on the end.

If the answer is no, you can set it aside.

What about you? What is something on your mind? Turn it into a question and add today. Sometimes the thing on your mind is happening today. The next question is still the same—What is one next right thing you can do today? Because that’s all you can do anyway. You can only do one thing at a time.

In short, I was stretched too thin but I didn’t fully know why.

The lines between home and work were hard to see, and I was the one who had to draw them. At that time, I wasn’t drawing them well simply because I didn’t realize I needed to.

But even good things come with shadows, and I’m learning to hold both the gifts as well as the burdens.

Do you see the power of naming things?

If you had trouble answering any or all of these questions, then that is where you are today. And there is no shame in that.

At some point this week, find fifteen minutes to take a walk alone.

First, walk without an agenda. Don’t expect to come back from a short walk with new perspective, magic peace, answers, or a plan.

Second, leave your earbuds behind. It can be good to walk slowly and listen to the world around you rather than letting music or a podcast carry you somewhere else.

Give yourself the gift of being with what is, all the ordinary sounds of this, your everyday space.

Here are two things you can release that could help you take your next right step.

Two, let go of your expectation of certainty. I

We must act.

So, for now, walk slowly with the flame still lit and continue to ask your friend Jesus about the next step.

Ask God for guidance and then trust him as you act.

I love the online space if for no other reason than we can learn anything we want whenever we want to learn it. I am a huge fan of online courses and teaching.

When I start looking for help before I’ve established a clear vision, it leads to me feeling anxious, overwhelmed, and emotionally whiplashed. If I don’t have a vision, purpose, or intention, then how do I know which steps are right for me to take?

you may need to intentionally ignore that space in order to get your own work done, whether that is work you are doing for an actual job or work you are doing on the level of your soul.

“Pay attention to what you pay attention to.”

I stopped trying to wrestle clarity to the ground.

PURGE YOUR INBOX, MAILBOX, AND/OR BOOKSHELF

Dietrich Bonhoeffer,

was overdosing on a good thing.