Alcohol is an addictive drug. There’s no shame in not being able to use it moderately. You are not unusual if you can’t stop at one or two. You’re not broken. Or weak. You’re actually the norm.
I finally got to a headspace whereby I realized that I deserved not to drink. I deserved not to have a life of 3am nausea and unreliability and zero money and bloodshot eyes. I deserved better.