Dear Writer, You Need to Quit (QuitBooks for Writers, #1)

by Becca Syme

your writing life is a system.

We still expect that we should be. That things should be easy. We should be happy. And we're dumbfounded when they aren't. When we get resistance, it surprises us every time.

But we have to stop being surprised by resistance.

I know I hit this hard, but you have to know yourself, and trust yourself.

Make it a sustainable one.

You’re creating your very own writer’s block.

Because the initiation of the loop matters.

When we don’t understand the purchase and acquisition on the side of New York publishers, then we’re not learning something valuable about the market we live in. It. Is. Volatile.

The reason the New York publishers survive is because they keep acquiring new authors, and there will always be new authors to acquire. But they are not in business to help any one particular author. They are in business to make money. They know that they make money by selling great books, and so they acquire a lot of great books. But most of the books don’t sell enough to pay the big cost of running a publishing conglomerate. So they keep acquiring until they find the next hit—and they will, just by the law of averages.

They are talented, they work hard, and they had timing and luck on their side. Because those are the four elements it takes to succeed.

because that’s what fear of missing out does to our brain. It makes us want to over-ride our logic centers in order to make the pain stop or the distraction stop or the frustration stop. We look for the soothing thing, to calm the pain or discomfort (it’s a different kind of soothing, for all of us), because our logic centers forget that the pain could save our lives. But our lizard brain just doesn’t want to feel the discomfort.

the fight-or-flight mechanism. It’s biologically programmed into our brains, to make us more quickly able to respond to danger. Fear produces adrenaline, which makes you either freeze, fight, or run.

Yet so few of us have a strategy for how to handle our fear. We let biology take over and we end up walking away from our sanity (or our path, or our strategy, or our calling) because the fear is

too great. It overwhelms every decision we make with the fight-flight-or-freeze.

Look back at your days. Find where you’re getting derailed by fear. Once you’re armed with knowledge, then you can get the support you need.

You have to tell people what you need, and warn them about what’s coming. You have to prepare them and rely on them. You can’t do this alone.

But if you have step two covered—you have the right people with you, and you have communicated with them—then let’s look at step three. Your plan.

Love and hate are memorable. ‘Like’ is forgettable.”

The key is, you have to answer all of these rhetorical questions. You can’t let yourself boost the fear so much that it rules you. Unanswered questions are the catalyst of the fear spiral. Everything will be okay. You are resilient. You can do this.

Build your endurance a little every day.

Sometimes we don’t take action because the fear

of the action itself is bigger than the reward the action promises. Because the action never promises certainty.

If you’re waiting for certainty, then acknowledge that, and stop waiting, because certainty will never come. What happens if there is no certainty?

But what can last forever is indecision. It’s called inaction.

It’s also called death. Inaction is where intention goes to die. Don’t let your intentions die because you are afraid. Find tools for how to deal with the fear, and pull the trigger.

Knowledge. Support. Plan. Execute.

it’s the acceptance that is the key. Acceptance makes action possible,

Look at the places in your life that are causing you the most difficulty. What is the assumption you’re making that causes the struggle? QtP.

So, in short, practice questioning the premise. A good rule of thumb is, if you’re feeling a lot of essential pain (or find yourself soothing a lot), there’s probably a premise around that you can question. Kneecap the fear. Question the premise.