When God Becomes Real

by Brian Johnson

As God healed my mind through the Word, it became clear to me that there were tough conversations that I now needed to have and was ready to have. Jenn and I scheduled meetings with those we felt there were still unresolved issues with. Before each one, I would get nervous, but the panic never came. I cried my way through most of those meetings but was able to be vulnerable. There was mutual understanding, and we were able to restore key relationships. We committed to a new way of doing relationships going forward. I wouldn’t withdraw when I felt misunderstood. I’d deal with things in the moment and talk about how I felt. They committed to the same thing. I wanted to have whole and healthy relationships. I needed that for my own peace of mind. As we mended those relational breaks, we began to experience this truth: forgiveness is rarely a silent thing. In order to experience the full power of forgiveness, the pains of the past have to be talked about and dealt with. Reconciliation has to be pursued, explored and chased after. Hindsight is perfect, and in hindsight, I can see that none of us had bad motives. None of us were out to hurt each other. We were all doing the best we could. We loved each other. Still do. It was just that sometimes our pain and issues got in the way. If I’d been more honest with myself, if I’d been more vulnerable with my pain, years of misunderstanding might have been avoided.