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November 4 - December 4, 2020
Play your role well by being the best you can be, focusing on what you control, and ultimately being a good person.
“Most of what we say and do is not essential. If you can eliminate it, you’ll have more time, and more tranquility. Ask yourself at every moment, ‘Is this necessary?’ But we need to eliminate unnecessary assumptions as well. To eliminate the unnecessary actions that follow.” – Marcus Aurelius
We’re unaware of the grains of sand trickling down from our life-glass. We make random choices with no goals whatsoever, until we wonder where our time went.
“Even the smallest thing should be done with reference to an end,” says Marcus Aurelius.
“If you seek tranquility, do less . . . do what’s essential.” This will bring a double satisfaction, says Marcus Aurelius, “to do less, better.” Ask yourself, “What are the most important things in my life?” Once you know what those things are, you need to prioritize them. And eliminate what didn’t make the list. This will gain you time and tranquility. Like everybody else, you have 24 hours in a day. And you choose how to spend those hours.
By seeking social status, we give other people power over us. We have to act in a calculated way to make them admire us, and we must refrain from doing things in their disfavor. We enslave ourselves by seeking fame.
Being the best we can be is what matters. Expressing our highest self in every moment. We shouldn’t seek thanks or recognition for doing the right thing. Doing the right thing is its own reward.
Let’s be indifferent to what others think of us. Let’s be as dismissive of their approval as we are of their disapproval. And let’s focus on where our power lies—our well-intended actions. Doing the right thing is its own reward. Let’s find satisfaction in that.
Our goal should be to “seek riches, not from Fortune, but from ourselves.”
We should never compromise our character to become wealthy. Being a good person is the highest good there is. And it’s all that’s needed to live a happy and fulfilling life.
“Until we have begun to go without them, we fail to realize how unnecessary many things are.
be aware of your time passing by, and spending it mindfully.
Take back your time and protect it like a mother protects her child. Focus on the things that matter and stop wasting time on things that don’t.
“At the end of your time on this planet,” Ryan Holiday asks you, “what expertise is going to be more valuable—your understanding of matters of living and dying, or your knowledge of the ’87 Bears? Which will help your children more—your insight into happiness and meaning, or that you followed breaking political news every day for thirty years?”
Who you truly are inwardly is way more important than who people believe you to be. Your most valuable asset is your character. It will help you win at what matters.
“Take a day off from work every now and then, but not a day off from learning.”
Let’s make sure we spend our time wisely so that we can look back with a content smile rather than a regretful sigh.
“Putting things off is the biggest waste of life,” Seneca says, “it snatches away each day as it comes, and denies us the present by promising the future.
The whole future lies in uncertainty: live immediately.”
Keep that in mind: Nothing but opinion is the cause of a troubled mind.
Only you have access to your mind, only you can ruin your life.
“It’s better to conquer grief than to deceive it.”
We should let the tears flow, but let them also cease. And we can sigh deeply as long as we stop at some point. Because at some point the consequences of grief are more harmful than what aroused it in the first place, says Marcus Aurelius.
As they say, if you find yourself in a hole, stop digging. Face the emotion, and get out of the hole. At some point the negative feeling will feed from itself, like a vicious cycle. You feel bad about still being grief-stricken, this will make you feel worse, and so on. You will keep on digging and never find out of the hole.
real man doesn’t give way to anger and discontent, and such a person has strength, courage, and endurance—unlike the angry and complaining. The nearer a man comes to a calm mind, the closer he is to strength.”
Instead of impulsively getting angry, take a deep breath and deliberately choose to stay calm. This calm will not only rob misfortune of its strength, but also empower you to act in a just and courageous way. As Marcus says, “The nearer a man comes to a calm mind, the closer he is to strength.”
We must stop attaching ourselves to external things and desires which are not under our control. Because a lack of control leads to fear.
“The man who has anticipated the coming of troubles takes away their power when they arrive,” says Seneca. That’s why it’s so important to prepare for challenging situations to arise.
“Who is there to prevent you from being good and sincere?” We have the inborn power to choose our actions and craft our character. “So display those virtues which are wholly in your own power—integrity, dignity, hard work, self-denial, contentment, frugality, kindness, independence, simplicity, discretion, magnanimity.”
Don’t wish for life to be hard, but neither wish for it to be easier when it gets tough. Rather wish for the strength to deal with it. It’s an opportunity for growth.
Desire not what you don’t have, but appreciate what you do have. Always be ready to give back what you’ve been given, and be thankful for the time it was yours to use.
“For philosophy doesn’t consist in outward display,” Musonius Rufus reminds us, “but in taking heed to what is needed and being mindful of it.”
“What brings no benefit to the hive brings none to the bee.”
“When a man assents, then, to what is false, know that he had no wish to assent to the false: 'for no soul is robbed of the truth with its own consent,' as Plato says, but the false seemed to him true.” – Epictetus
Let’s not forget that we’re privileged. Not everybody had the same upbringing as we had. Not all have the same genes, education, and early exposure. These things highly influence a person, and it’s not something we can control.
Whenever you come across a situation with people who seem to act wrongly, it’s an opportunity for growth. Because you can practice the virtues of self-control, forgiveness, kindness, and patience.
every soul is deprived of truth against its will. The same holds true for justice, self-control, goodwill to others, and every similar virtue. It’s essential to constantly keep this in your mind, for it will make you more gentle to all.”
To err is human. We all make mistakes. But we forget. And get angry when others make the same mistakes we made not long ago.
To err is human; to forgive, divine.
Don’t wish for people not to do wrong, rather wish for the strength to be tolerant and forgiving.
Imagine how much more forgiving you’d be if you could see other people’s missteps as inevitable, natural, or stemming from an illness? They got misrouted. It’s not their fault.
Attention: At all times, keep in mind that maybe you’re wrong this time. Maybe you’re the one erring.
The best revenge is to let it go and be a better example.
Remember the art of acquiescence: we want to accept everything as it happens. Because it’s not under our control and we can’t change it once it happened. Reality is as it is.
“I’m constantly amazed by how easily we love ourselves above all others, yet we put more stock in the opinions of others than in our own estimation of self . . . How much credence we give to the opinions our peers have of us and how little to our very own!”
“Associate with people who are likely to improve you.”
“The key is to keep company only with people who uplift you, whose presence calls forth your best.”
The focus is inward. To make yourself better and to leave other people to that task for themselves. Everybody must go their own way.
We must not forget why we engage in philosophy in the first place: to improve ourselves. It’s not a tool to correct others. This will only cause pain and suffering.
“The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.”
