His focus on the logistics was its own kind of support—the only kind he knew how to give. I wanted to tell him how much the distance between us had hurt me over the years, and how I believed that his failure to parent me was partly what had led to my relationship with Peter in the first place. But I understood that my need for closure with my father was a product of the culture I grew up in that placed so much emphasis on it. He didn’t have the tools to understand the psychological impact his parenting had on my life—I couldn’t expect him to acknowledge his wrongdoings. So I let him reclaim
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