The Broken Circle: A Memoir of Escaping Afghanistan

by Enjeela Ahmadi-Miller

He was adamant that a true Muslim didn’t kill other people in order to force their religion on them or hurt other people in a business or personal dispute.

I hoped that Mommy would recognize me. That she wouldn’t mistake me for the wolf I was becoming. Like my kin that I had seen in the woods, gray and sleek, staring at me with bold black eyes and a bloody muzzle. We were the same in so many ways—tenacious and fearless.

“I hope for the freedom of Afghanistan,” he said. “I am not afraid, even to die.”

They went willingly into the darkness with only the hope that their sacrifice would mean something more than spilled blood alone—freedom for their children and for me.

“One cannot exist with a heart torn in half between two loves, two decisions, or two worlds, because it will eventually break in two.”

I had witnessed up close how rude and violent men were determined to force their version of love and safety on others using guns and blood. It didn’t matter what the men called it, political order or religious fervor, it was all from the same place—the hellish dark side of man that is motivated by hate.

Hate is not from God. People who use religion to hate can’t love God. It is impossible.

An even deeper mystery I wrestled with was that I believed we existed in the hands of God. He evidently carries us with a light touch. He does not clench his fist around us and force any of us to hate or love—these are choices.

“Everything that surrounds you, all this beauty, is the work of Allah,”

Pray Somewhere in this world— Something good will happen.

‘This place where you are right now, God circled on a map for you.’”

Once in the past, I asked a bird “In what way do you fly in this gravity of wickedness?” She responded, “Love lifts my wings.”

“What you see is what love looks like. They can touch each other, yet they don’t irritate or enrage each other. All throughout the world, love speaks to us, what it means to cherish and be kind and to respect each other. If we miss the message, we will get lost. We will lose out on what’s important.”